Some things are better left undead.

Halloween seemed subdued this weekend. Expecting at least a modest turnout at one of my normal watering holes last night, we found about five people, no costumes, no wild dancing, or drug-snorting, or anything else of the sort. Maybe it was quiet because, with the election tomorrow, we have a surplus of real, shake-in-your-boots, clammy-handed terror and don’t so much need those ghosts and goblins this year. At least, that’s my theory. Whatever, it’s a way better theory than the alternative: that everybody else was having the time of their lives and forgot to tell me.

But fear not, for one brave, injury-riddled Mississippian took the future of the country into his own hands yesterday and saved us all.