Baby PigsI went home this weekend to attend to my mother, the nine-and-a-half-fingered wonder. Really, it was nothing that a really expensive dinner couldn't fix. (Well, morale-wise; dinners don't make fingers regenerate, AFAIK.) I also got to pet some baby pigs, who squealed with delight as they forced themselves on me. Then I went and played with my best friend's baby, now 7 months old and very much a piglet herself with fat thrusting arms and legs and a vocabulary that consists of "EEEEEEEEEEEE!" and "PPPPBBBBBBTTTTHHHHT!" I realized that her pornstar name (first pet's name + childhood street name) was Salty Cummings, and I told her parents so. NB: Don't tell parents these things. Posted by Dana at 07:37 PM
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Jesus and TequilaIndeed darling Sally, speaking as a parent, I can confirm that the thought of our daughters engaging in a vigorous double penetration scene culminating in a jerk-job bukkake flourish? Instigates the kind of rage that prompts runs on those 100-foot rolls of black plastic you can get in the painting section at Home Depot.
Piglets, you can do with them what you will. My hope is that it involves lettuce, tomatoes and aioli.
Posted by: Fes at August 18, 2004 12:00 AMcheer from the backfield, etc.
Posted by: fishfucker at August 18, 2004 05:55 AMThey never really lose the "PPPPBBBBBBTTTTHHHHT!" That one goes a long way. Even in grad school, from what I hear.
Posted by: adampsyche at August 18, 2004 09:20 AMaioli?
You're in america, fes. It's mayo. I'll eat it and I'll even order it that way, but in my heart I know it's mayonnaise.
Posted by: jonmc at August 18, 2004 09:51 AMIt's garlic mayo, jon -- two great tastes that taste great together!
Posted by: Vidiot at August 18, 2004 12:53 PMSorry Jon, but I can't help but mentally associate "mayo" with "clinic" and that's definitely not the mental image I want coursing through my bean whilst I'm tucking into some nice porky goodness.
Posted by: Fes at August 19, 2004 09:52 AM