Actionable items

If any of you are in a shite mood, the kind that makes you crave a beer at, say, 10:30 am, I highly recommend you go read Ten Things You Used to Be Able to Get Away With in Grade School But You Probably Can't Get Away With at Work:

3. Johnson has done it again! He stole your idea and presented it at the meeting before you could get a word in edgewise. Even while he’s reaping the praise of your supervisors, he’s staring at you with a shit-eating and “What are you going to do about it, sucker” grin on his face. So after the meeting, you and Jose from IT confront him in the men’s room. While Jose pins him to the floor, you lift his shirt and begin quickly slapping his bare stomach as hard as you can with the palm of your hand until its good and pink and he’s calling “uncle.” Note: Don’t let the headiness derived from Johnson’s humiliating pink belly fool you into believing that Jose wouldn’t hold you down while Johnson gets his own licks in on you. It is important to note that workplace allegiances are transitory.