February 27, 2004
11 Comments

Bumpus dogs!

The other night I came home to an apartment full of natural gas. Turns out that Gordon, despite having no thumbs, is capable of turning knobs on the stove. Surprisingly he was still quite lively, mewling for food while I frantically ran around the apartment opening all my windows.

Then, as if on cue, my phone rang. It was my mother, wondering why I hadn't called her in two weeks. What timing.

After enduring a 45-minute conversation with my mother without the pacifier of a cigarette or 12, I am confident that if I had to I could withstand your basic South American interrogation techniques.

However, that doesn't compare to the dog party at SarahSpace's house:

I came home from work last night to find this:

• A bottle of red wine laying broken on the floor

• An empty formerly dog-proof container for dog food on top of the coffee table.

• A sealed gallon of water seeping on to the carpet from giant teeth marks.

• Every cardboard box in the house torn to shreads....

I suppose I should be glad that Gordon does not weigh 70 pounds.

Posted by Dana at 10:41 AM

Comments

Thumbs are overrated. Also, from what I understand, every day is a dog party at SarahSpace's house.

Posted by: jpoulos at February 27, 2004 12:29 PM

There is a reason why dogs belong in the outside.
Cats, however are no less destructive. A cat that has been around me lately has a peculiar addiction to manilla folders and plastic sheet protectors, in this days of Tax filing the cat is having a paper fest. I am glad that Dana did not blow up with her apartment. I would suggest her to take the proper considerations in avoid the possibility of Gordon playing with human gear.
(Good Lord, Dana, the cat has tried to gas you! Chemical Gordonli'...)

Posted by: GREAT LEADER at February 27, 2004 12:48 PM

Our cats (Humbert Humbert and Lolita) routinely destroy things. Chipped CRT monitors, broken Brita filters, etc. The day one of them figgers out how to turn a dial or push a button, it's all over.

Posted by: adam at February 27, 2004 12:58 PM

Everyday is not a dog party at my house! Well, maybe it is, but this was an especially wild party. I told the boys I'm taking the damage out of their toy allowance.

Posted by: sarahspace at February 27, 2004 01:56 PM

yay! Comments have returned!

Posted by: Vidiot at February 27, 2004 02:04 PM

The dogs at my house talked the cat into going up on top of the fridge and knocking over a 5 lb box of meaty bones to rain onto them below. Basically it's a co-conspirators party at Casa Tizzie.

Posted by: tizzie at February 27, 2004 02:17 PM

Whenever Sarah posts about her dogs I am reminded of Dogs in Elk.

Tizzie, I think that the cat's just *telling* you the dogs talked her into it. I think she did it on her own, to get them in trouble.

Posted by: dana at February 27, 2004 02:25 PM

Thanks, I just read Dogs in Elk. That needs to be an Act on This American Life.

Posted by: monk at February 27, 2004 02:48 PM

My friend Cate's cat decided to get even with her once for going out of town. Sometime between catsitter #1 (me) leaving the house the night before and catsitter #2 (another friend, Wendy) arriving in the morning, Spot managed to pull a towel into the bathroom sink and turn on the water.

When I left, everything was nice and peaceful. Spot was sleeping on the sofa, biding his time until he was unsupervised. When Wendy arrived the next morning, there was a little puddle of water outside the front door and the entire apartment was flooded with water. Yuk. Three rooms of soaked carpeting.

The worst my two have ever done is TP the entire house (why did I leave the cabinet open?) and hide their furry mouse toys under the covers of my bed. Guess I'm lucky.

Posted by: aine42 at February 27, 2004 03:32 PM

I want to start a band called Dogs in Elk.

Posted by: jpoulos at February 27, 2004 03:40 PM

Gordon's a cat.

Which makes everything that much more *eerie*, doesn't it?

Posted by: Fes at March 2, 2004 02:34 PM