I can't look at "cum" spelled that way without thinking of Quiet Riot.

Has there been any definitive statement by grammarians on how 'cum' should be spelled? Because it ain't in my AP styleguide. No mention of specs in the Writer's Guide entry for Penthouse Letters, either.

I kinda think it's a dumb word for both the action and the substance. But sadly it seems to be the best one we've got. Ejaculate sounds like something you'd do to your house's plumbing, and orgasm sounds to much like spasm. Semen likewise is too clinical, but then again even though it's the origin of life and all that shit, it's kind of a nasty substance after all the excitement has worn off, so maybe it dosent deserve a better name.

In my experience they *always* warn you, but it's always too little, too late.

So to speak.